Can’t sleep, clown’ll eat me spaghetti

Not being able to sleep when you really really want to sleep is the worst. A good distraction is preparing a midnight (5:00am) snack (second dinner).

This is the finest and cheapest tomato sauce that can be made in the time it takes to cook spaghetti. Dried spaghetti that is. Obviously.

Feel free to leave out ingredients with a * if you don’t have them to hand. You’ll end up with a marginally less delicious, but still tasty, tomato sauce. Oh and don’t measure anything. Measuring’s for dorks.


Olive oil

Garlic (I used two cloves because I LOVE GARLIC but I am fully aware that I will wake up tomorrow smelling like a garlic monster)


1 x 400g tin tomatoes (chopped, whole, whatever. Passata’s also grand, will make a smoother sauce)

2 x anchovies*

Large squeeze tomato puree

Healthy glug balsamic vinegar*

Black olives, pitted and halved*

Crushed chilli flakes*

Tiny tiny pinch cocoa powder*

Sugar, salt, pepper to taste

1. Boil water. Add dash of olive oil and spaghetti. In a separate pot, fry crushed garlic in olive oil for 1-2 mins.

2. Mush in anchovies. Add olives. Add tin of tomatoes and tomato puree and all the other ingredients on the list. Bring to the boil and allow to reduce to a thick sauce while the spaghetti cooks. Serve.

This makes enough for two medium portions or one huge portion. Pop half in the fridge for lunch tomorrow.


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